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alias: juniper
player age: 24
player pronouns: she/her
character age: thirty-five
occupation OR house/set/dorm + year: beauxbaton's caretaker
relationship status: dating
small gif #1 (canon): https://i.pinimg.com/originals/7d/fb/a5/7dfba5dd59dda9e65cb5778f0126f2d3.gif
small gif #2 (face claim): https://media1.tenor.com/images/11ea7485d9a199c2b67bb6fd7916dd86/tenor.gif?itemid=5477568
character fandom: marvel animated universe
app/shipper: not yet
thread tracker: not yet
canon spirit: bucky barnes
patronus: currently unable to produce (when able: snow leopard)
boggart: losing steve
time zone: est
profile image: https://i.pinimg.com/originals/2a/96/41/2a96414c15df5785dd5628e48116f038.gif
mp3: not yet
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Joined: 15-June 18
Status: (Offline)
Last Seen: 17 Jul 2018, 07:23 PM
Local Time: 18 Jul 2018, 03:22 AM
11 posts (0.3 per day)
( 0.05% of total forum posts )
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james barnes

Beauxbatons Staff

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10 Jul 2018, 09:14 PM
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he was shaking, trembling as he reached out to take hold of steve’s hand. he was trying to hold it together, he was trying to convince himself this was real, this wasn’t his mind this couldn’t be his mind—but then again, it’d been so long since he’d touched someone else. touched steve. the second his hand met steve’s it was like a surge of heat flooded through him, it was like his insides had been turned to ice, frosted over and just the touch of steve rogers hand was igniting his bones and bringing him back to the land of the living.
<p>
he stepped closer to the blond, this boy who he’d protected through school, he remembered all the times steve was sick or he got hurt from a fight he’d gotten himself in…and now? steve was…he looked so much older. he looked tired, he looked like he was worried, and bucky tried not to look in his eyes for too long for fear he’d see the absolute shame hidden behind them.
<p>
if steve was speaking, bucky only heard the rush of his own heartbeat, and he straightened himself to stand completely and his vision began to blur. his feet wavered underneath him, it’d been so long since he’d seen steve….that was all he could think about. steve. did steve hate him, he wondered? did steve know about everything? he must’ve, his best friend was an auror now, he’d come in with other aurors to help get bucky out of here, and that thought alone made james’ chest tighten. he could remember all the times they’d talked about being aurors together and saving the world from bad witches and wizards—
<p>
”s-steve, i…” his voice cracked from the amount of screams and shouts and misuse, and he hated how just the sound of the other’s name on his lips felt foreign. it felt too sacred, too pure, as if he was tainted and couldn’t say it anymore. he couldn’t even speak anymore, he just stepped forward, hand holding onto steve’s for dear life as he buried his face in his best friend and old lover’s shoulder and held onto him, his whole body still shuddering from the cold, soaking up all the warmth that vibrated off of steve.




</div> </div>


</div>
<div class="ad"><div class="af"><b><i class="fa fa-tags"></i></b> steve rogers &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;<b><i class="fa fa-heartbeat"></i></b> love u </div></div>
<div class="kb">© KB</div>
</center>
[/dohtml]
22 Jun 2018, 01:10 AM
square cartoon icon: here

square gif: here

avatar:


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jason peter todd
<div class="bc_appline"></div>
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<div class="bc_appmain2">
<input type="radio" id="bc_appmain2-5" name="bc_appmain2-group-2" checked>
<label for="bc_appmain2-5">THIS IS ME</label>
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<img src="http://ilarge.lisimg.com/image/14049947/1080full-k.j.-apa.jpg" width="450px" />
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<div class="bc_appmain2">
<input type="radio" id="bc_appmain2-6" name="bc_appmain2-group-2">
<label for="bc_appmain2-6">BASICS</label>
<div class="bc_content">

<table><tr valign="top"><td>
<div class="bc_tretext"><div class="bc_tretext2">

<h1>Basics</h1>

<h2>Name</h2> <h3>jason peter todd</h3>
<h2>Age</h2> <h3>nineteen</h3>
<h2>Member Group</h2> <h3>auror in training</h3>
<h2>Pref. Pronoun</h2> <h3>he/him</h3>
<h2>Face Claim</h2> <h3>kj apa</h3>
<h2>Sexual Orientation</h2> <h3>demisexual</h3>

<h1>Career/Schooling</h1>

<h2>Occupation</h2> <h3>student</h3>
<h2>Workplace/School</h2> <h3>hogwarts</h3>
<h2>Class</h2> <h3>slytherin alunni</h3>

<h1>Magic</h1>

<h2>Blood Status</h2> <h3>unknown (muggleborn) </h3>
<h2>Wand</h2> <h3>14" hazel with dragon heartstring </h3>
<h2>Boggart</h2> <h3>List here (What is their greatest fear?)</h3>
<h2>Patronus and memory</h2> <h3>List here (Even if they can't perform it, what would it be, and what memory would they use to conjure it?)</h3>
<h2>Dementor-induced memory</h2> <h3>List here (If a dementor made them relive their worst memory, what would it be?)</h3>
<h2>Mirror of Erised</h2> <h3>List here (What deep desire would they see in the mirror?)</h3>

<h1>Player</h1>

<h2>Alias</h2> <h3>juniper</h3>
<h2>Timezone</h2> <h3>est</h3>
<h2>Contact</h2> <h3>discord or pm!</h3>
<h2>Other Characters</h2> <h3><a href="http://bombardamaxima.jcink.net/index.php?showtopic=5355&view=findpost&p=25146">bucky barnes</a></h3>

</div></div>
</td><td>
<div class="bc_treimg">
<img src="http://i.imgur.com/2SfCBnP.png" width="200px" />
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</td></tr></table>
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<img src="http://i.imgur.com/kEMzxbt.png" width="200px"/>
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</td><td>
<div class="bc_sectext"><div class="bc_sectext2">

when you were young, you liked to think your parents were too busy and successful to keep you. they’d come back, they’d scoop you back up into their arms, and they’d take you home once things settled down in their lives. maybe they were outrunning someone, maybe they were spies, or under cover agents…maybe they worked for the federal bureau of investigation…whatever it was, they knew they couldn’t give you the love you deserved. you liked to think that was why you were left on the front doorstep of the orphanage like you were an afterthought.
<p>
you didn’t know about magic then.
<p>
when you were 5 years old, you already made the owners of the orphanage frustrated. you were sarcastic, you challenged them, you didn’t let them do anything without giving them a hard time, and you received plenty of smacks for it. but sometimes they were just awful people and you never liked awful people. you used to gather the other kids, older and younger and you’d form a little revolt—no bedtime until 9:00pm. that was all you wanted, you were five and you wanted to stay up later and the owners would be damned if they didn’t let you.
<p>
you’ve always been good at wearing people down.
<p>
when you were around 7, you thought maybe your parents were hurt. maybe they’d died. maybe something horrible happened to them. you thought that was maybe why they didn’t come back for you. other kids, friends of yours, younger and older who had started to look to you for advice or guidance had started to get adopted. the younger ones always went first. they were still cute, and despite you being young still, no one seemed to want an abrasive, sarcastic little chatterbox. you always had something to say, always had a retort or remark to clap back at someone, you were only 7 when you began to see that maybe people just didn’t want you.
<p>
you were protective of your fellow orphans, and if there were ever parents who were definitely not a good fit for the child they were looking at, you stepped in. even at 7, you could tell that there were bad people in the world and some of your friends were so naive and kind and if you saw even a hint of anger in the adoptive parents, you tried to do something about it. you didn’t want your friends to go away, never to be seen again, only to be taken by someone who was horrible. angry. violent.
<p>

when you were 8, you remember it was the first time you were told to soften yourself for others. you were too sarcastic, too talkative, ”potential parents want to adopt the perfect child, jason.” they’d say, you’d sit in the office of the two owners, wardens, you liked to call them—”maybe take a deep breath and count to ten before you answer any questions. can we practice that now?” they were still frustrated by you, and you sat in the rickety old wooden chair that was placed in front of the desk, and both of them stood and looked down at you as though you were some sort of menace.
<p>
you were bounced around to a few orphanages, different cities, there wasn’t a whole lot of luck for you. you made friends in other orphans, got hand-me-down clothes from older kids who ended up being adopted before you…that was annoying. them getting adopted before you, that is. you even tried doing what you were told, you tried to be kinder. you tried to smile more. you would brush your hair so hard it hurt, you dyed it black because your red hair only seemed to make people overlook you, you tried to look better. gentler. like some of the other kids you knew.
<p>
it was when a young couple came into the orphanage that you discovered magic for the first time.
<p>
that sounds happier than it was.
<p>
they were the first couple that even wanted to sit and talk to you. you were scolded before hand, preliminary scolding, a pre-slap on the cheek and an order to behave before even doing anything wrong in the first place. you were walked out into a little room with toys and chairs and a table with blocks on them, and you ignored the childish toys in favor of meeting the eyes of the two who’d asked to see you.
<p>
you were 10, at the time. the woman reached out her hand to you and introduced herself, and her husband followed—”i’m miranda.” and ”i’m david.” they looked far too young to be adopting a 10 year old, certainly they’d want someone younger, someone they could mold into their own perfect little child better than jason.
<p>
<hr>
<p>

<h1>CONNECTIONS</h1>
List any and all connections between this interpretation of the character and their original canon.

</div></div>
</td></tr></table>
</div>
</div>

<div class="bc_appmain2">
<input type="radio" id="bc_appmain2-8" name="bc_appmain2-group-2">
<label for="bc_appmain2-8">SHIPPER</label>
<div class="bc_content">

<div class="bc_ship"><div class="bc_ship2"><div class="bc_ship3">

Introduce your shipper here.

<br><br><br>

<h2>FRIENDS</h2>
Fill in for friends.

<p>

<h2>LOVERS</h2>
Fill in for lovers.

<p>

<h2>ENEMIES</h2>
Fill in for enemies.

<p>

<h2>OTHER</h2>
Fill in for any other relationships.

</div></div></div>

</div>
</div>

</div>

</div>

</div>

<div class="merc_cred"><a href="http://cttw.jcink.net/index.php?showuser=160">merc</a></div>

[/dohtml]
21 Jun 2018, 11:50 PM
[dohtml]<link href='http://minatesting.b1.jcink.com/uploads/minatesting/templates/rubytrack.css' rel='stylesheet' type='text/css'>
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<center><table><td valign="top"><div class="burgundy"><img src="https://78.media.tumblr.com/2f77af75d822f481af16356e4522e719/tumblr_inline_nreqi6TtcH1qlt39u_250.gif"></div>
<div class="vermilionbox1"><center><div class="rubytitle">JAMES BARNES</div>
<br>"BUCKY" &loz; 35
<br>BEAUX STAFF &loz; CARETAKER

<bR><bR><div class="scarletbottom"><a href="http://bombardamaxima.jcink.net/index.php?showtopic=5349&view=getlastpost">APPLICATION</a> &nbsp;
<br></div></center></div></td>
<td valign="top"><div class="rubytrack1">
<center><div class="carminetitle">ACTIVE THREADS</div></center>
<p><div class="vermilionlinks1">
&loz; <a href="http://bombardamaxima.jcink.net/index.php?showtopic=5355&view=findpost&p=25102">you need a friend</a><br> with <b>jim hawkins-wrynn</b><br><br>
&loz; <a href="http://bombardamaxima.jcink.net/index.php?showtopic=5359&view=findpost&p=25104">we're not that different you and i.</a><br> with <b>loki laufeyson</b><br><br>
&loz; <a href="http://bombardamaxima.jcink.net/index.php?showtopic=5361&view=findpost&p=25107">i've got a surprise for you</a><br> with <b>merida o'dunbroch</b><br><br>
&loz; <a href="http://bombardamaxima.jcink.net/index.php?showtopic=5365&view=findpost&p=25148">silence speaks volumes...</a><br> with <b>rayne soquili</b><br><br>

</div>

<center><div class="carminetitle">FINISHED THREADS</div></center>
<p><div class="vermilionlinks1">
&loz; <a href="link">thread title</a><br> with <b>name</b><br><br>
&loz; <a href="link">thread title</a><br> with <b>name</b><br><br></div>
</div></td></table>
<div class="minacredit"><a href="http://cttw.jcink.net/index.php?showuser=206">&loz; MINA &loz;</a></div></center>[/dohtml]
15 Jun 2018, 02:46 AM
tw: violence, self harm, brainwashing, murder.


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<div class="bc_app"><div class="bc_app2" style="background-color: #009999">
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james buchanan barnes
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<input type="radio" id="bc_appmain2-5" name="bc_appmain2-group-2" checked>
<label for="bc_appmain2-5">THIS IS ME</label>
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<img src="https://ic.pics.livejournal.com/wauwy/10439479/165866/165866_original.png" />
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<label for="bc_appmain2-6">BASICS</label>
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<h1>Basics</h1>

<h2>Name</h2> <h3>james buchanan barnes (bucky)</h3>
<h2>Age</h2> <h3>thirty five</h3>
<h2>Member Group</h2> <h3>beauxbatons staff</h3>
<h2>Pref. Pronoun</h2> <h3>he/him</h3>
<h2>Face Claim</h2> <h3>sebastian stan</h3>
<h2>Sexual Orientation</h2> <h3>demisexual</h3>

<h1>Career/Schooling</h1>

<h2>Occupation</h2> <h3>caretaker</h3>
<h2>Workplace/School</h2> <h3>hogwarts, then durmstrang</h3>
<h2>Class</h2> <h3>1st set alumni</h3>

<h1>Magic</h1>

<h2>Blood Status</h2> <h3>pureblood </h3>
<h2>Wand</h2> <h3> ash, unicorn hair 13"</h3>
<h2>Boggart</h2> <br><h3>losing steve, he feels like steve is the
embodiment of whats good in this world and so as long as steve is okay,
bucky doesn't care what happens to him.
</h3>
<h2>Patronus and memory</h2> <br><h3>he can no longer produce a patronus. when
he could, his best memory was the first kiss he shared with steve, and
his patronus was a wolf.
</h3>
<h2>Dementor-induced memory</h2> <br><h3>a quick snapshot of him killing people,
being in his own body but not being able to control it, blood everywhere, the
light in his victims eyes go out as he watches them without a flicker of emotion.
</h3>
<h2>Mirror of Erised</h2> <br><h3>living peacefully somewhere with steve, the two
of them are smiling and laughing together, sitting on a hillside on a bright
sunny day, steve accepts bucky for who he is and what he's done and doesn't
blame him. bucky still blames himself, but he's getting over it and healing.
</h3>

<h1>Player</h1>

<h2>Alias</h2> <h3>juniper</h3>
<h2>Timezone</h2> <h3>est</h3>
<h2>Contact</h2> <h3>discord</h3>

</div></div>
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<label for="bc_appmain2-7">APPLICATION</label>
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<div class="bc_sectext"><div class="bc_sectext2">


<br>
<p><br><p><br><p><br>
<center><br><bR></bR>
<div style="letter-spacing: 1px; font-size: 20px;"><font=courier>желание</font> - <i>desire</i>
<br><br>
<img src="http://orig09.deviantart.net/600a/f/2014/283/7/4/star_divider_by_1julivia-d82bhaa.png" width="220px">
</div></center>
<p><br><p><br><p><br><p><br>
<p><br><p><br><p><br>
<p></p>
he could see his memories leave him like a heavy exhale in
the midst of winter, thin and whispy and <i>cold</i>--he could still remember
things, he could still remember the good in his past, but he had only just been
thrown into azkaban a month ago. he had years of happiness for the dementors to
take from him. but even after a month, even after 30 excruciating days,
he feared deep inside how much happiness he truly had left.
how many years was his sentence? oh, right.<p>

</p> <blockquote><i>for l i f e .</i></blockquote>
<p>

</p>but this was not a life
worth living.
<p>
he wavered on his feet and looked to the hooded figure that sent chills to his core,
made the whole prison cell feel like bucky was standing on snow with
bare feet and no clothes. it loomed over him, clawed talons made of bone and cartilage
beckoning at the wizard before swooping in and getting too close for comfort —

<blockquote><i>“sometimes i think you like getting punched.”
you smiled, chuckling as you wrapped your arm around steve’s
shoulder. always standing up for the little guy despite
<b>being</b> the little guy…it was part of the reason you liked
steve rogers so much. he never gave up.
<p>

</p><b>”i can do this all day--”</b>
he’d said. you didn’t doubt him for a second. he was a gryffindor
through and through, there was no denying it. he was reckless, fearless,
<b>stupid</b>. but he was your best friend and you would’ve
followed him to the end of the line. it was during dueling club that it'd happened, steve, bless his heart, a squib trying to excel in magic--he would never go down without a fight.
<p>
you didn't understand at the time why steve was so good, why he was so ready to
be kicked around, and you always intervened whenever you could. you would always
protect him. his safety was all you ever desired.
<p>
<b>"you're a punk."</b>
<p>
"jerk."
</p>
</i>
</blockquote>

<p>
he thought about the happiest moments of his life, the way it felt when steve smiled at
him, the way it felt when his parents invited steve over for sunday dinner, the way it
felt when girls looked at him and he could feel steve's eyes on him too--the way it
felt when they spent their summers together, youthful and glowing and eager to take
over the world when they got older.
<p>
he thought about those moments and he pulled away from the dementor and if the thing
had a face, it would've been scowling with a twisted amusement. still full of life,
bucky spat on the floor in front of the dementor before wiping at his mouth with the
only arm he had left, and stepping backwards into the corner. he wasn't going down
in this place without a fight.
</p>


</p><br><br><br>
<p><br><p><br><p><br>
<center><div style="letter-spacing: 1px; font-size: 20px;">
ржавый - <i>rusted</i>
<br><br>
<img src="http://orig09.deviantart.net/600a/f/2014/283/7/4/star_divider_by_1julivia-d82bhaa.png" width="220px">
<br><br>
</div></center>
<p><br><p><br><p><br><p><br>
<p><br><p><br><p><br>
<p></p>
he was innocent. he’d said it over and over again, but the evidence
pointed to him. it didn’t matter if he said he wasn’t in the right mind, he remembered
all of them. all of those he killed. he could still see the looks on their faces
as he tore through them like they were nothing.
<p></p>
it didn’t <i>matter</i>…nothing mattered anymore. he’d been told by the judges
and jury that he had gone as <i>the winter soldier</i>. he was inclined to believe
them. despite having no control over his actions, despite believing in his heart that
he could not go to azkaban, he remembered killing them. the trial pointed to him,
the evidence showed that he was the one who broke into facilities around the world
and put an end to their CEO’s or their command officers, the evidence marked him at
the scene of each murder.
<p>
</p>he was a weapon but they neglected to consider that he was a weapon without
a mind of his own, and even sitting at his trial, he could barely defend himself.
<p>
the thoughts went spiraling around in his head, and the dementor simply watched him,
no features on hits face, no nothing--just a void where emotion should've been.
it would leave, and days later, maybe weeks later, the same one or a different one
would come back just to remind him of his position in the prison. he was going to die
here.
</p>
they’d taken his mind from him. they stole it.
<p>
<blockquote><i>”who stole it, james? who stole it?” <p>

</p>the courtroom was imposing
in every way. the judge looked down at you as the entire room circled the rusted cage you
stood in, eyes were on you from every angle and you could feel judgement and horror.
<p>
if only steve could see you now. did he even know? did he have any idea where you
were? what you'd <b>done?</b> surely he would've held your face and met your gaze with
that startling intensity and said something along the lines of "you didn't mean to
do it. it wasn't really you." and yes. he would've been right. you didn't mean to do it.
<p>
but you did it. you wish you could wipe your memory of their faces like those who
had made you do it.
</p>
</p>
<p><b>”i don’t…i don’t remember, your honor.”</b></i>
</blockquote>
<p>
and the dementors don't care if you're innocent or guilty.
</p><br><br><br>
<p><br><p><br><p><br>
<center></h><div style="letter-spacing: 1px; font-size: 20px;">семнадцать - <i>seventeen</i>
<br><br>
<img src="http://orig09.deviantart.net/600a/f/2014/283/7/4/star_divider_by_1julivia-d82bhaa.png" width="220px">
<br><br>
</div></center>
<p><br><p><br><p><br><p><br>
<p><br><p><br><p><br>
<p></p>
<p>
how long had it been? 4 months? bucky had been using the broken shard of concrete
to mark the walls with days, but after a while they began to blend into each other.
it was impossible to tell how long he'd been here, but one thing was for certain,
it wasn't as long as he thought it was. and the dementors loved to gorge themselves
on the dwindling good memories he had left. they were ever present, reminding him
of every mistake he'd made, every chance of happiness in life he couldn't have.
<p>
they always got so awfully close. bucky stilled tried to resist.
</p>

<blockquote><i><b>"we're moving. my family and i."</b> your tone was solemn, there
was a lethargy to your voice as you laid back against the grass and looked up
at the stars. it was late, steve lay by your side and the deafening sound of
bugs chirping filled your ears while fresh air filled your lungs. the summer
had only just begun.
<p>
"you're leaving? do you want to go?" you were about 17 years old
at the time. still young and still so, <b>so</b> naive. <b>"i don't have a
choice, but...yes. yeah. i think i do. i think it'll be fun."</b>
<p>
you lied. you lied a lot to make steve feel better.
<p>
you felt your heart tighten in your chest and you thought about how on
earth you'd be able to fit in halfway through your schooling, so much of
your time had been spent in hogwarts, in the comfort of the gryffindor
common room, in the great hall, on the quidditch field--steve used to watch
from the stands and cheer you on as you'd grin, ear to ear whenever you
scored a point. star chaser.
<p>
it was time to start all over. from the beginning.
<p>
<b>"i'll see you during vacations. just...don't do anything stupid
until i get back, okay?"</b></i>
</blockquote>
</p>
</p><br><br><br>
<p><br><p><br><p><br><br>
<center></h><div style="letter-spacing: 1px; font-size: 20px;">рассвет - <i>dawn</i>
<br><br>
<img src="http://orig09.deviantart.net/600a/f/2014/283/7/4/star_divider_by_1julivia-d82bhaa.png" width="220px">
<br><br>
</div></center>
<p><br><p><br><p><br><p><br>
<p><br><p><br><p><br>
</p>
the thoughts that slipped in and out of james' mind had become significantly
darker since his arrival. it'd been a year. one whole year, and he'd tried to
fight back with everything he had, he tried to be resilient but <i>god</i>
the dementors are the worst things ever to exist. originally, bucky tried
to talk, he figured running his mouth would be one way to just...keep himself
<i>sane</i>.
<p>
he didn't even feel like talking anymore. he was in his own solitary, and
it was like he'd run out of things to say. he'd ran out of words to
formulate.
</p>
the dementor this time was just like the last one before it, and the one
before that. ruthless. it was as if they floated into his cell merely to
remind him that they'd already taken so <i>much</i>. bucky didn't know what
other memories or joy he had to give, already his body shaked and trembled
in response to the cold as he stepped backwards and into the corner of his
cell, clenching his eyes shut and sinking down against the wall into a ball.
he held his knees tightly to his chest with his one arm, he tried to breathe heavily, tried
to ignore and block out what he knew was about to happen, and he could feel
the cold get sharper, more biting with each second.
<P>
his teeth chattered, and his fingertips began to feel numb, and he buried
his face into the crook between his knees and chest for only a moment before
it was as if his hair was tugged roughly, he was pulled up by an unseen
force and made to look right at the dementor towering over him, and with
a feeble <i><b>"please, d-don't--"</i></b> the dementor leaned in close.
<P>
<blockquote><i>"bucky, you've been gone so long, i thought you
were dead!" steve had laughed, pulling you into a warm, comforting hug
as soon as you got off the train. it was the summer, it'd been a long time
since you'd seen steve, and going to durmstrang had not been a piece of
cake for you.
<p>
<b>"i thought you were smaller?"</b> you tilted your head in honest
confusion, though a smile was on your lips it was incredibly strange
to suddenly see what a year could do to steve, was it magic related?
surely he hadn't had some sort of second puberty to catapult him into
the realm of greek gods, but that's what he looked like now.
<p>
you spent the summer with him, talking until the crack of dawn like you'd done
in years past, but you were different. durmstrang had made you different. you were alone there,
dark arts were running rapid throughout the school, there was corruption
in everyone's heart it seemed..."how was school, buck? i'm sure the ladies
liked you."
<p>

you didn't have the heart to tell him the truth. you didn't want
steve to worry. <b>"you know me, stevie. i'm irresistible. even the
durmstrang girls want me, and they're really picky."</b> you smiled,
and you were sure steve probably saw right through it. he always could
tell when you lied.</i>
</p>
</p>
</blockquote>
when the dementor finally let up, he let out a shout, he still tried so
desperately to hold onto any semblance of himself, and he reached up his hand
and tried to put space between the two of them, as if that could work.
nothing worked in here.
</P>
</P>
</p><br><br><br>
<p><br><p><br><p><br><br><br>
<center></h><div style="letter-spacing: 1px; font-size: 20px;">печь - <i>stove</i>
<br><br>
<img src="http://orig09.deviantart.net/600a/f/2014/283/7/4/star_divider_by_1julivia-d82bhaa.png" width="220px">
<br><br>
</div></center>
<p><br><p><br><p><br><p><br>
<p><br><p><br><p><br>

durmstrang had been an eye opening experience for bucky. all he could dwell
on now in prison was the negative moments, and going to durmstrang had
kick started everything that spiraled downwards in his life. you'd blocked
out much of it, you'd tried to forget that time there, the people you kept
company with...it was out of necessity, it was out of a need to survive,
to excel, and while you were a top student, it was like you did something
to incur certain people's torture. not torture like this. nothing was torture
like this.
<p>
but it was reminiscent of a cult, it was dark arts being
used for someone's benefit and you didn't participate, no--but you were
dragged into it all the same. the negativity you felt there, they were
all fond of the unforgivable curses. bucky had fallen victim to the
cruciatus curse countless times for their entertainment, if he even tried
to get up and walk out, instead he'd be crumbling to his knees and
contorting in pain--he'd take that over the dementors.
</p>
he stood in the center of his cell and stared at the dementor, eyes dark
and pleading as it crept forward. some days were better than others, here.
it'd been a year and a half. maybe. he didn't even know for sure anymore.
a year and a half of <i>this</i>--
<p>
<blockquote><i><b>"mom, dad, i don't want to go back there."</b> your
mother stirred the pot of stew that sizzled quietly on the stove and
turned back to you, hand on her hip. "your father's work led us here,
sweetheart. it'd be silly to send you back to hogwarts now." you hadn't
told her what was going on at school, but you wished she could've just
sensed it. you wished she could've reached into your heart and felt
the absolute anguish that was welling up there. it'd been two years at
durmstrang, your final year was now and she was right. it would be
silly to go back to hogwarts for half of your final year.
<p>
but you hated it here.
<p>
"son, i know you had lots of friends in hogwarts, but you're still
in touch with them. you're excelling in your classes at durmstrang,
that’ more important. you will not be going back just because you
miss your social life, do you understand that?" your father didn't
even look up from his paper as he spoke, and you looked down at your hands in your lap.
<p>
<b>"yes sir."</b></i>
</p>
</p>
</p>
</blockquote>
</p>
</p><br><br><br>
<p><br><p><br><p><br><br><br>
<center></h><div style="letter-spacing: 1px; font-size: 20px;">девять - <i>nine</i>
<br><br>
<img src="http://orig09.deviantart.net/600a/f/2014/283/7/4/star_divider_by_1julivia-d82bhaa.png" width="220px">
<br><br>
</div></center>
<p><br><p><br><p><br><p><br>
<p><br><p><br><p><br>
the stillness in the air made his skin crawl, the way the darkness was so
comfortable to him now...his mind could only go back to the moments he'd killed.
would he have done it if steve was there? would steven grant rogers have been
able to break through the imperius curse? surely if anyone could, it would've been him.
he was stronger now than ever, idly bucky wondered where he was now.
<p>
steve was so strong.
<p>
bucky used to be the strong one for him.
<p>
but bucky couldn't fight the imperius curse and he was still under
the effects of it at the trial, he <i>must've</i> been. funny how
solitary can either bog down your mind or simplify it. then again,
maybe everything seemed clearer because so many of his good memories
had been taken away.
<P>
<blockquote><i><b>"stevie, don't cry okay'?"</b> you smiled,
bright, cheeky grin as you took out the bandages and ointment from the first aid
kit. <b>"it's gonna sting a little."</b> of course, you knew steve
wasn't going to cry. even at the ripe age of nine, steve was the
toughest kid james knew.
<p>
"just because you'd cry if it was your knee that was hurt, doesn't
mean i will, bucky!" he was joking, there was a shit eating grin on his face,
and even if there wasn't, he was never really mad at you.
<p>
<b>"wow, what the heck you little punk? and here i am trying
to help you!"</b> steve only smiled and crossed his arms over his
chest, before you went ahead and fixed him up with the ointment and
bandaged his wound.
<p>
"thanks, buck." you smiled and gave him a hug, held him close
to your chest and sighed. <b>"you know i'll always be here to look
out for you, steve."</b>
<P>
"i know."
</i>
</p>
</p>
</p>
</blockquote>
</P>
</p><br><br><br>
<p><br><p><br><p><br><br><p></p>
<center></h><div style="letter-spacing: 1px; font-size: 20px;">добросердечный - <i>kind-hearted</i>
<br><br>
<img src="http://orig09.deviantart.net/600a/f/2014/283/7/4/star_divider_by_1julivia-d82bhaa.png" width="220px">
<br><br>
</div></center>
<p><br><p><br><p><br><p><br>
<p><br><p><br><p><br>
he used to be so kind.
<p>

</p>now he felt like he was nothing,
he felt like he <i>had</i> nothing, he was not james buchanan barnes anymore, he was
inmate #32557. he wasn't even human anymore. all he did was sit in his cell,
or pace, or lay on the cold cot that was provided for him and mull over
all the awful things he'd done. but at one point, he knew he was kind.
at one point he remembered being told he was. he remembered looking out for
steve and other people and trying so hard to protect those who couldn't
protect themselves.
<p>
he'd always tried to be optimistic. he'd tried so hard.
<p>
there was nothing and no one to try for anymore.
<p>
his mind brought him back to steve, he wondered where his best friend
was, maybe he was married. if bucky was counting correctly, he was 27
now. maybe 28. he'd spent around 5 years in azkaban, barely got any
visitors, and it was because he hoped steve didn't know he was here.
<p>
honestly, he'd tried to make it seem like he was dead. his parents
knew. the trial was in secret, hopefully papers weren't published, but
bucky couldn't be sure. he hoped steve didn't know. if there was one
thing he could find solace in, it was the hope that steve didn't know
he was wasting away here in azkaban. convicted, guilty, whether controlled
or not.
<p>
it would break his heart.
</p>
if he saw this? if he saw the way bucky felt dread fill in the pit of
his stomach, if he saw the way he wavered on his feet as a dementor
closed in on him, if he saw the way bucky sucked in a shaky breath,
as though he was accepting his fate worse than death just because a
dementor was around him--he didn't want steve to know. that's all he wanted
now. for steve to be blissfully unaware, for him to have moved on to
have a successful happy life, as an auror maybe--just like bucky had
wanted to be when he was young.
<p>
<b>"no more, <i>p-please</i>--"</b>
</p>
<blockquote><i>"james! why did you do this?”
<p>
she smiled at you, holding the rose in her hand as she tucked her hair behind her ear. <b>"it's valentine's day, pretty girl like you shouldn't be without a valentine, right?”</b> you'd always been known as a charmer. she laughed and stepped forward, into your personal space and threw her arms around your shoulders.
<p>
"i wish all men were as kind-hearted as you.”
<p> she knew that there wasn't a promise of future romance in the rose you'd given her, but that didn't matter. it was in the gesture, it was in the thought, and she didn't deserve to be without a valentine on this dumb holiday. no one did.
<p>
in the back of your mind, you could imagine steve rolling his eyes. </i>
</blockquote>
</p>
bucky let out a choked cry, wetness welling in his eyes as the dementor
pulled away from him and he dropped to his hand and knees, dark hair
messy and long from years of being locked away from society,
skin pale from the lack of sunlight he got in his cell. his body
was trembling, his breathing ragged, and he didn’t dare look back
up at the dementor. he didn't have any fight left in him.

<blockquote>he had so few good memories left.</blockquote>
<p>
<p><br><p><br><p><br><br><br><br>
<center></h><div style="letter-spacing: 1px; font-size: 20px;">возвращение
на родину - <i>homecoming</i>
<br><br>
<img src="http://orig09.deviantart.net/600a/f/2014/283/7/4/star_divider_by_1julivia-d82bhaa.png" width="220px">
<br><br>
</div></center>
<p><br><p><br><p><br><p><br>
<p><br><p><br><p><br>
</p>
things are still for once in a while. there is no overwhelming chill in the air, and bucky can only stare up at the ceiling and hope that the rocks would start to lose their hold and crumble down on him. he feels so numb. he doesn't feel anything anymore, no embrace of emotion, even pinching himself or cutting into his skin doesn't make him feel a thing.<p>
he holds onto the few good memories he has left like they're precious gems and he tries to seem small and insignificant and unimportant whenever the dementors float through the hallways or past the tiny window.
<p>
<blockquote><b><i>"we should have our own homecoming dance, then."</b> you leaned over the
edge of the bridge that connected hogwarts main castle to the grounds. <b>"if the
americans get to have their dances, why not us, right? like the yule ball! you'd make a pretty date for someone."</b>
<s>(you wanted that someone to be you)</s>
<p>
"that's okay, buck. i'm not really much of a dancer." yes, you know that. pushing yourself back
and away from the open bannisters on the bridge, you turned to look at steve and you
tilted your head in question. <b>"what i taught you how to dance?"</b> you looked
completely serious, there wasn't the usual amused grin on your face, not now. you wanted
this too.
<p>
"what, like right now?"
<p>
<b>"like right now."</b>
<p>
it didn't take much coercing before you had your arm looped around steve's waist, he'd
always been shorter than you, and sure, you both were still young, but you had a feeling
that he'd always have problems with his health and size. some people judged him for it.
some people teased him for it, they were cruel and rude and made a mockery of him,
but if there was anyone who could take it, it was steve. but you didn't want him to have
to take any abuse, and as you held his hand in yours and you swayed, alone on the
bridge to no music at all, you thought maybe this could be enough.
<p>
and it was always worth it to make him smile.</i>
</p>
</p>
</p>
</blockquote>
</p>
</p><br><br><br><p></p><br><br><br>
<p><br><p><br><p><br>
<center></h><div style="letter-spacing: 1px; font-size: 20px;">
один - <i>one, alone</i>
<br><br>
<img src="http://orig09.deviantart.net/600a/f/2014/283/7/4/star_divider_by_1julivia-d82bhaa.png" width="220px">
<br><br>
</div></center>
<p><br><p><br><p><br><p><br>
<p><br><p><br><p><br>
he doesn't know who it is at first when someone comes to see him in his
cell. he doesn't get many visitors, and he has so little sense of his own
surroundings anymore, he feels so much like a monster and so little like
a human being that he can't even bring himself to look up.
<p>
his first guest in years and he simply sits against the wall, knees
tucked against his chest and arm dropped, fingers dragging against the
stone ground. it's not until he hears a voice speak to him, it's gentle,
soothing, warm--like a soft blanket wrapped around his shoulders, it
comforts him--<i><b>"bucky?"</b></i> the brunette's eyes wander upwards,
and it's then that they land on a golden figure, practically glowing
in the darkness, and it took bucky's eyes a moment to adjust.
<p>

</P>
</p>
</p>
<p>
<blockquote><i>"don't scream, soldier."
<br><br>
how had you let yourself fall into this?
how did you let these people have so much power over you? black magic?
the need for blood and flesh in order to make a spell work--you were a weapon
at that point, your body was part of that. you didn't matter. you were alone.
you were so alone.
<p>
"soldier?"
<br><br>
when you spoke, your voice didn't even tremble. though soft, it didn't quiver,
you were on your own, one, alone. <b>"ready to comply."</b>
<br><br>
you stared at the witches and wizards that talked amongst themselves, eyes
bleary and filling with a wetness you couldn't even control. you didn't dare
let them fall. you were numb, you were nicknamed the winter soldier for a reason,
militaristic in the way you were efficient, the way you behaved--maybe they forgot
they'd constantly had you under the influence of the imperius curse. maybe they
thought obedient was just your nature. winter? because you were cold, you were
reserved, you didn't speak until spoken to.
<br><br>
and things were going down hill, they needed a spell in order to all but vanish
from this realm, from this plain of existence, and you were disposable despite
your service to them.
and they cut through you with force. arm taken from you for their benefit like an old car being taken apart for its pieces. your eyes didn't leave the group that
collected to the side. and you saw red. and you winced, you clenched your jaw,
and as your vision started swimming, everything eventually faded to black. </i></blockquote>
</p>
he stared for a while, eyes pinned on the other man like the glowing red of a
muggle's sniper rifle and he let out a trembling breath. when he spoke, his
voice was hoarse, broken and fragile from lack of use aside from screams.
<p>
<b>"...s-steve?"</b>
</p>
</p>
</p>
</p>
<p>
<p><br><p><br><p><br><br><br><br><p></p><br><br>
<center></h><div style="letter-spacing: 1px; font-size: 20px;">
грузовой вагон - <i>freight car</i>
<br><br>
<img src="http://orig09.deviantart.net/600a/f/2014/283/7/4/star_divider_by_1julivia-d82bhaa.png" width="220px">
<br><br>
</div></center>
<p><br><p><br><p><br><p><br><br>
<p><br><p><br><p><br>
steve came back to visit a few times after that. those bright blue eyes
were dull, they were pained, bucky felt his stomach churn in guilt and
shame any time steve looked at him. he was a disgrace, he was a murderer,
he was vile, he should be ashamed, and yet steve came with other members
from the ministry, he seemed so adamant to prove that you were under the
control of a spell and that the bucky he knew would never do such a thing.
<p>
he's right. you wouldn't.
<p>
it's with steve looking at him that he buckles under the pressure. bucky
had always looked after steve. day after day, week after week, month after
month...but this time was different. this time steve was looking after him.
and the guilt of disappointment made bucky so ill he felt like this
was maybe worse than the dementors.
<p>
<blockquote><i><b>"when we graduate from hogwarts, i'm going to be the best
auror ever!"</b> you jumped up onto the abandoned train car, spining around
and leaning against the doorway. you tossed your wand from hand to hand,
spinning it in your fingers like a baton as a huge smile was plastered
on your face. <b>"me and you, we'll be a team!"</b> steve smiled up at
you as you reached down to take his hand and hoist him up and onto the
freight car.
<p>
"we do make a good team, and i want to be out there helping people with
my magic. the world needs more aurors, always." you chuckled and took a
seat, patting the wooden panel floor of the rusting train car as if to
invite steve to join you. <b>"you ever get tired of being the most
righteous person in the world?"</b> steve smiled and sat beside you, and
you wrapped your arm over and around him, letting him rest his head
on your shoulder.
<p>
"no."
<p>
he spoke, amused, and you looked up to the sky, sun setting
in a blur of crimsons and pinks and purples, and in the midst of
your quiet reveries, suddenly the sound of coughing interrupted
your thoughts. turning your head you saw steve leaning forward,
coughing into his elbow, with a pained expression on his face.
jumping down off the train car, you spun around to face steve with concern.
reaching for him, helping him down off the car, you pressed a kiss to the
top of his head and took his hand. <br>
<b>"steve, hey, c'mon. let's get you out of here."</b></i>

</p>
</p>
</p>
</blockquote>
</p>
the cell door was open and steve stepped inside, his movements slow,
purposeful and out of instinct, out of habit, bucky was pinned against
the back wall, cold stone pressed against his back. he was weak, he'd
been fed here, but his mind was so weak, his resolve was so weak, he was
no longer someone to be proud of. he didn't want steve to see him like
this so close.
<p>

<b>"stay back."</b>
<p>
but steve only stopped momentarily, as if to show bucky some kindness
and show him that someone would listen to him. he wasn't powerless.
reaching out, steve extended his hand and bucky flinched for a moment
before a trembling hand reached back to take hold of a hand that was
warmer than anything he'd felt in years.
<br><br>
<b><i>"bucky? just stay with me. let's get you out of here.”</i></b>
<p><br><br><br><br>
<hr>
<blockquote>after being taken from azkaban by the ministry and aurors, bucky was put through a second deliberation to prove his innocence. one of the leaders of the order he’d fallen into stood at the accused, and confessed to using unforgivable curses, and the ministry in its horror, attempted to smooth over their wrongdoings for sending an innocent man to azkaban for so long.
<p>
bucky hadn’t denied that he commited the crimes, but he had been away from the effects of the curses, and with steve by his side he had the confidence and strength to admit that he was innocent this time.
<p>
it didn’t take long for him to work with the ministry and give names of other members of the order, he no longer feared they would come for him, and in that time he was shown to the best person for the job to give him a prosthetic for his arm. by then it had healed over, but to be pieced together again slowly was a great step in the right direction.
<p>
bucky wanted to go back out in the real
world without judgement but didn’t know what sort of occupation would lend to that, and the ministry suggested that beauxbatons recent caretaker had passed on, and they, as consolation for their sentencing him, would give him the job if he could handle it. he’s been there for the past year.
<p></blockquote>
<p><hr>

<h1>CONNECTIONS</h1>
<b>name</b> - bucky's real name is james barnes, "james" meaning
"he who follows", and bucky would follow steve rogers into the pits
of hell if he had to.
<p>
<b>headers</b> - bucky's trigger words, i used them in this setting as perhaps
important moments in bucky's life and for some reason those are the words
that stood out to him and fueled the dementor's feeding.
<p>
<b>best friends</b> - bucky and steve were good friends, in the comics they
meet in boot camp, and so in this universe, they meet shortly before bucky's first
year at hogwarts, and then continue to be best friends at school.
<p>
<b>quotes</b> - shoutout to a few famous bucky quotes from both the animated
series and mcu.
<p>
<b>to durmstrang</b> - this is supposed to mimic bucky being taken by HYDRA,
his first year at durmstrang he got in with the wrong crowd out of necessity,
and ended up changing slightly. (this is to echo when hydra first got him
and started torturing and brain-washing him).
<p>
<b>1st summer away from durmstrang</b> = as if steve saved bucky from being
tortured by hydra, this first summer they spent together is supposed to be
the last time steve sees his best friend still trying to hold onto who he
was in the past. (just like bucky had been being tortured and tried not to
show steve how bad it was.)
<p>
<b>cruciatus curse</b> - this was to represent the torture bucky went through
when he was a prisoner of hydra, this was a way for the dark arts and
influencers at school and after he graduated from durmstrang to control him
through pain.
<p>
<b>1st set</b> - being an excellent student, bucky was skilled primarily
in dueling magic and trickery, and so he was a prime candidate for being
'brainwashed' and used to carry out dark biddings.
<p>
<b>imperius curse</b> - just as bucky barnes was turned into the winter
soldier after years and years of brainwashing and torture in the show/comics/mcu,
bucky was tortured and then imperio'd in order to become a high hit
assassin since he was so skilled with magic and was incredible thorough.
the imperius curse acts as a brainwashing tool so it made sense why bucky would've
done all of the things he did (ie. assassinated people in secret and has a
handful of kills on his back)
<p>
<b>dementors</b> - since the imperius curse is only temporary, and bucky
barnes in the animated series and so on looses all his memories, dementors
were the perfect way to convey this! locked away in azkaban for far too long
for crimes he didn't willingly commit seemed like the closest way to have him
have been tortured and used and brainwashed by hydra for 70 so years.
<p>
<b>prisoner number</b> - bucky's serial ID number on his dog-tags is #32557,
which is his inmate number.
<p>
<b>proven innocent</b> - just like in the series, bucky is found to be under
the control of someone else when he performed all of his assassinations and
such. with the help of higher ups and steve, he is finally let go from
azkaban after 11 or so years of being there.
<P></P>
<b>metal arm</b> - not included in his app because it's something that happen's
when he gets out of prison, but him recieving a prosthetic to make him feel
like a complete person again happens!
<p>
<b>healing & paranoia</b> - he still fears that he could be under the watchful
eyes of the dark witches and wizards who controlled him in the past, and
so healing will be a very long process. trust issues are abundant unfortunately
and this is to reflect the fact that not only has bucky been tortured in the
series and used, and people were his missions, but he's also still potentially
dangerous due to trigger words. though, that's not the case in this setting,
since the trigger words are more related to the dementors than his 'brainwashing'
by use of the cruciatus and imperius curses.
</p>
</p>

</p>
</p>
</p>


</div></div>
</td></tr></table>
</div>
</div>

<div class="bc_appmain2">
<input type="radio" id="bc_appmain2-8" name="bc_appmain2-group-2">
<label for="bc_appmain2-8">SHIPPER</label>
<div class="bc_content">

<div class="bc_ship"><div class="bc_ship2"><div class="bc_ship3">

“they made you a weapon and told you to find peace.”

<br><br><br>

<h2>FRIENDS</h2>
bucky here has been through a LOT, from suffering from the cruciatus curse and then the imperius curse and unwillingly committing murders, to then being put on trial and sent to azkaban for those murders, and he was under the watchful, horrible eyes of the dementors for a long af time until he was found and proved innocent. SO, that being said, he’s struggling getting back into the real world, the ministry wanted to smooth over their mistake of sending an innocent man to azkaban, so they gave him a cushy job at beauxbaton’s as the caretaker. he definitely could use friends, it’s been a while since he’s had any sort of positive relationships, so please, give him unlikely friendships! he may seem distant and a little closed off at first, but he’ll crack a joke or two when he feels like it, and he is definitely healing and getting to be more himself before all the madness!

<p>

<h2>LOVERS</h2>
so of course he’s in love with steve, i’m a huge fan. but, when bucky was in school, he was well known to be a flirt, and so any past flirtations are totally welcome! nowadays, he doesn’t do that anymore, he doesn’t see a point in it not only because <i>steve</i> exists but also because he just literally doesn’t have the motivation atm.

<p>

<h2>ENEMIES</h2>
while its possible some of the members of the cult-like thing he got involved in are still around, bucky’s preferred method of dealing with enemies is FLIGHT. he is not interested in fighting anyone, killing anyone, more than anything he just wants to be left alone. he will fight if necessary, and he’s very capable of doing so, he just would much rather not. plus he’s suffered enough! (that being said, if you wanna throw enemies at him be my guest.)

<p>

<h2>OTHER</h2>
just give him love please<3 i figure i will time-skip and bucky has been out of prison and working at beauxbatons for a little under a year!
</div></div></div>

</div>
</div>

</div>

</div>

</div>

<div class="merc_cred"><a href="http://cttw.jcink.net/index.php?showuser=160">merc</a></div>

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